19 December, 2012

Reclaiming My Self-Respect

The next blogpost is a happy one, but before that, I need to get the following out of my system.

21st December is coming, and although I'm not a believer, I choose to believe it's a chance we reflect on ourselves and think about what's really important to us.

Since the day I heard about Friendster, so many people have wasted so much time of their precious lives collecting friends, asking for testimonials. Much later on, the fad passed and I thought we've all grown up. But when Facebook came into the picture, many people sank back into the race of time-wasting.

I've had my reservations about Facebook because back then, I've heard classmates comparing who have more friends - 500 or close to 1000.

But really, what does that matter?

It should have been a red light, when you feel really down and realise that there's no one in your phonebook who could spare you the time, and no one on Facebook who took you seriously.

You waste your time on those people who can do without you, even wasting your time texting them when you are with people who actually gave a damn about who you are and how you are.

I've just emerged once again from another deep pit of my life. Many may think there couldn't be anything that bad when I'm just 21 years old, and have a long journey ahead.

The truth is, I almost didn't make it this time this year. And that challenge had given me a fresh perspective of life and love.

If you can't spare your time for your friends, and fob us off with promises that never really happen, why should I waste my time, effort and even money on you?

There was a line in Fame that struck a chord in me - you take and take and take. And sad as it may be, that's the truth of how you've wasted many valuable friendships. But that's not going to be the case from now on.

You know, Facebook and Twitter may decline one day, and you'd be left with nothing more than a statistical pride of the past. Deep inside, you have nothing, and you've lost everything that matters.

I've given up asking why people don't treat me the way I treat them - respect, love, and making them a priority. It just shows that I've wasted my time, and that's a mistake I'm going to put right from now on.

My effort had been wasted and I've come to realise that all I did was cheapen my effort, and wasted my life.

From next year on, I'm going to have more self-respect, and leave those who regarded my love nothing more than dirt and dust.

What's going to change for you next year?
Never ever make someone your priority, if they only make you an option.
Worse still, a last option.